You may have had at least one encounter if you have sold for a while, where you immediately received a “silent treatment.”
When he called me a few weeks ago, Anthony mentioned this problem quite poignantly :
“Ari, I don’t know what to do about the “silent treatment” – you know that I have worked for a long time with a prospect, and have had wonderful discussions that have been of interest to us, and then immediately it all ends, they have expressed interest in our approach.
And I think I lost the sale and I don’t know what I’ve done wrong, or what to do next. It makes you feel like a frustrating and hard operation.” It is just a matter of course that I’ve lost the market, I think I don’t know what I’ve done wrong.”
You might have been concerned and confused if anything occurred to you. You could have told yourself, “It’s not as if I was the one who was doing something wrong. It’s like I put anything about the relationship.
The “Hopeium” Trap
When your prospects is showing you a “silent treatment.” there is a pressure-free way to regain contact, but first, it is necessary to understand that why the condition has arisen.
Most of us who sell are swept up in the comical word “hopeium,” which means that we insist on selling the products. Yet expectation may be a lie, when you cannot keep your most important aim in mind: to discover the truth about your prospect.
When we put our eyes on the result — selling — we immediately tend to predict how the process works and expect stuff to unfold as we intend.
But if this mentality breaks down abruptly and our prospects break out, we feel lost, concerned, disappointed, defeated, and puzzled. We are concerned about what has gone wrong.
We might also feel treacherous.
Is it possible to clear the mystery?
Oh, by giving up your agenda and finding the facts of what you are hunting for – and being all right. “But how can I learn the truth when they’re avoiding me?” you might wonder. “And why do I need to let go of the sale?”
First of all, let’s take the second question.
You will bring sales pressures into the partnership if you handle the prospect because you still expect that the sales will happen. This will scare away your opportunities and ruin all your faith in them. You should instead remove the burden from sales by telling them that you are all right with their decision if they have opted not to continue.
In other words, instead of attempting to follow up and pursue calls, you take a step back while you concentrate on getting “yes.”
The resulting image is:
It doesn’t mean you’ve missed business if a prospect offers you the silent treatment. It means just that you have not already learned the facts.
Call to hear the facts is what you ought to do.
Why is it so important to discover the truth?
Four main interpretations are given here:
1. You avoid losing confidence in the ability to sell. Our dreams come under pressure from a “silent treatment,” which starts to condemn us. It is a debilitating limbo situation where we wonder where we stand. Our discourse is pessimistic and full of self-denial and we ask ourselves if the sale is going to continue in any event.
2. You improve sales productivity and reduce tension. You will either stay interested in the possibility or move on after learning the facts about the opportunities. “A no is almost as valuable as a yes.” I always say. Why? It allows you the time to find resources that suit your solution more effectively. This helps you to work even more easily so you can instantly get rid of anyone that buys aren’t. Without the voice whispering of shame, understanding the prospective reality makes you walk free, “If you give up, you don’t have what it takes.”
Learning the reality about your prospects results in actual dollars. You are also going to avoid the self-sabotage burden of living in “silent treatment”.
3. Prospects are pushed away by sales pressures. When you respond by calling and e-mailing to the “silent treatment” you tell them that you are willing to move the sales process forward – that is, you are asking for your needs and not theirs. It mistrust them and leads them on the other path.
4. The “silent treatment” — a truly destructive contact — is the way prospects guard against sales pressure if they feel safe telling us their facts. The more we press, the more they move.
Yet it’s quite the reverse. The more we relax and invite the reality, the better they are. Prospects feel all better when they know weíre all right when they learn what’s going on with them.
How to Reopen Communication
After Anthony and I addressed these topics, he said, ‘Ary, all of this is really meaningful, but when I call, I don’t know what to say.’
It’s better than you might imagine.
* Give the prospects just a call first. (E-mail and voicemail are rather impersonal, but just use them as last destinations if after many phone calls you are unable to achieve your perspective.)
* Secondly, take responsibility for the “silent treatment” and apologize.
I suggested to Anthony here a certain language that helps prospects to feel comfortable enough to disclose to you the truth of their situation:
“Hey, Jim! That’s Anthony. I just wanted, first of all, to call and apologize that we couldn’t talk. I feel like I may have slipped somewhere in the way, or I didn’t give you the details I needed. I’m not calling to move things forward because I suppose you were actually moving out with someone else.
The findings are obviously shocking to you if you respond this way to the “silent treatment” You might also know that the prospect does not come back to you for genuine reasons.
You would be less depressed and more active. It’ll make a difference in the level of success, tension, profits and how much you love doing.
Recall!
The selling hasn’t been missed. You don’t yet know the facts.